Under a Gemini sky, she appeared to me 

Mystery and mirror colliding,

 Echoing out my fears and pain and beauty and Magik 

Sent out to the world and returned to me

An Inferno, 

the super massive black hole kind of catch you off guard falling

In letters screeching love and love screaming stop and halting as you brace for it

It is 

Inevitable injustice,

The opposite of nothing

Super massive black hole happiness

Intentions and obsessions, complete now

Drive through sunrises a given, 

how did I not notice why that happened, and when did I stop seeing?

Things as they were

   did you just  stop noticing too? Understanding? Caring? 

She is peace. Peace and open, with 

calm ocean homecomings

Home and the hereafter

are carried in her laugh that replays often in her absence

almost on command

A soul, calling another home

Through song 

  and likely brain waves, and world waves, and cosmic versions of waves that humans don’t deserve. 

Through super massive black hole memories

to be made and martyred

The proverbial one day suddenly appearing before you

A sunrise generated prayer, thank god

She is love, echoed and ethereal, 

traversing all the space aisle holes of nothingness and everything,

Colliding into static motion. 

this one second…

that I will hold forever.

Driving home

through a heavy mist of memories

new roads and old thoughts, always

neverending words to haunt me.

I listen for distractions

and invite anyone’s,

anyone else’s mantra to replace my own

As I envision new beginnings

and wonder where that strength comes from, and why

and where

and how

do I pursue one last time for the millionth

time?

An appeal to the universe yields no answers

but for running out of gas, under a rainbow

Beautiful distractions.

Maybe they are the answers, as good as any

through winding tunnels of green and grief and trepidation

the roads that stretch before me

seem longer than those already driven ,

apparently not destroyed…

that was me.

Under a broken down rainbow the ghost words continue

constant companions

a love-hate relationship if you will

one. more. chance.

one more choice!

one more leap – the kind without faith behind it

without crutch

or carry

or maybe even care

without, I hope, this tarnished cross that has mocked me

through countless trials

and even more executions, and yet

time passes

or fools us into passing

or exists, and fools us into existance

despite all the warnings

of No Exits

that rise

as ghostly incense, an apology for nothing

Follow the shadow of the rainbow

and I am not surprised

that this does not lead me home.

Nor does this stranger

digging through his truck for change

and that smile I fake

so many decades in the making

Deciding as I drive away

that beauty

is the greatest deceipt

in this vast and treacherous ocean

of false gods and mirages.